सुख और दुख

भग़वान दुख देता है शिक्शा के लिये और सुख देता है परिक्श के लिये!

These lines, I heard once in this Ramananda sagar serial, "Ramayan".

It says it all!!


P.S: I used http://www.lexilogos.com/keyboard/devanagari.htm for devanagari script. It did not have the alphabet 'ksha'!

I want it ever'GREEN'!

If I am arrogant,

please correct me,

but don't abandon me

If I am boastful,

Please subdue me

but don’t boycott me

If I am lazy,

Please enliven me

but don’t leave me

If I am foolish,

please bear with me

and don’t forsake me

Scold me,

Haul me over the coals

But please don't walk out of my life

If the ‘Green’ goes off, then what will remain here...Oh Mother!

If your Big Beautiful eyes do not cast your care on me, who else will!

Better late than Never!

To some Diwali means festival of lights and crackers, to some it also means festival of sweets. All these years that's what Diwali meant to me also. Additionally, it was also meant to show off my new dress to friends. But this year, Diwali became a festival of learning for me! I know its too late to learn these basic things....but I am glad atleast now I wanted to learn these. I learnt to make Badushah (Its called Balushahi in the North), Ashoka Halwa, Murukku and mixture. I also made my  favourite recipe- the Chocolate. Wow, it was very exciting to see that they all came out reasonably well..!

Spent two days relishing all these sweets and sharing them with friends and family! Besides these, I also had the usual dose of Medu vadai, Thayir Vadai, Suhyam.....and the ladoos, adhirasams and gulab jamoons that our neighbours shared with us! Ended the day with that traditional Diwali Legyam (a digestive medicine)! Never knew that I had such great appetite !

Cheers and good going Lals!
Now back to gym!

Chaos at home

There is some repair work going on inside our home, because of which we are forced to totally vacate 2 rooms of the house for the workers to work there. So now the living space left for us is the hall and a kitchen. And that hall also looks like this. (Look at this picture of the state of our hall today).

Poor mom!! She has just a couch to sit, read or even lie down!

In short, my home today looks like a platform in a railway station with so many people loitering around, with so much of dust, with so much of stuff piled up in one place and more so to see my mom lying down in the couch at one corner. This reminds me of the night I spent with my friends in the Amritsar railway station a year ago. Cannot forget that crazy night and fun filled times we had together. My heart yearns for more such moments!

This post is from a corner of this hall !

Relationships......

WHAT KEEPS A RELATIONSHIP STRONG ARE:

1. TRUST
2. COMMUNICATION
3. INTIMACY
4. A SENSE OF HUMOR
5. SHARING TASKS
6. SOME GETAWAY TIME WITHOUT BUSINESS OR CHILDREN
7. DAILY EXCHANGES (meal, shared activity, hug, call, touch....)
8. SHARING COMMON GOALS AND INTERESTS
9. GIVING EACH OTHER SPACE TO GROW WITHOUT FEELING INSECURE
10. GIVING EACH OTHER A SENSE OF BELONGING AND ASSURANCES OF COMMITMENT


How many ever times I read this, I feel so good. When I see any two people with such strong relationship, I feel great and inspired. That tells me that it is not just theory, but can be practiced.

Main nahin maakhan kayo........

I love this Surdas bhajan "Main nahin makhan khayo"!
When Yashoda Maa catches Little Krishna red-handed, when he is stealing butter, she asks Krishna, "why did you steal the butter and eat?", Krishna says, "Maiya Main nahin Maakhan Khayo...." (Maa, I did not eat the butter) and little Krishna establishes that he did not eat the butter.
He justifies his point by giving explanations:
First he says,
1) I return after grazing the cows only late in evening, where is the time for eating Butter?
When Maa does not agree to this argument, he says
2) I am such a small boy, I have small hands, and you have hung the butter at such high place, how can I take and eat butter from there?
When Maa does not agree to this also,
3)He says, the Gopis are keen in complaining about Him to her and so they deliberately applied butter on his face so that he is caught.
Then, he tries other smart tactics....
4)Little krishna tries to flatter his Maa by his sweet words.
Now also Yashoda Maa is unhappy.
5)So now, Little Krishna shows a little anger and says "tomorrow onwards I will not go for grazing the cows"
Then also when Maa shows anger,
6)He says something which no mother can listen...He says "You are my step-mother, which is why you are blaming me like this."

Now, Maa is unable to listen to such big words just for a butter, so she says, "Kanhaiya, Te nahin maakhan kayo" (Krishna, you did not eat the butter.)

Now that Maa has accepted and Krishna won the argument, He again now says, "Maiya...Mai ne hi Maakhan kayo." (Maa, I only ate the butter).
Surdas ji's play with words (Main Nahin & Mai Ne Hi) is the speciality of this bhajan!

Listen to this bhajan rendered by Anup jalota: Surdas bhajan- Main nahin maakhan kayo

Sometimes HIS ways are so strange that, first He makes you deny certain thing, then He makes you agree with the same thing that too by making you give up your arguments, ego etc. Then He again tells you, "Oh, forget it, you don't have to agree to it"and makes you deny it again!!!!" STRANGE ARE HIS WAYS! But I strongly believe there are strong and valid reasons to HIS ways. 

Malarum ninaivugal!

I had to drop my mother in the temple and go to Ganapathi nagar yesterday. I went through Vibhuthi street. Sometimes, it is really amazing that a road, a board can just rekindle the past so much. As I crossed the 'Parthasarathy hotel' and the house next to it, memories poured in. I wanted to stop and take a photo of it with my mobile camera, for this blog. But vehicles behind were honking. So had to move on.

But those were days which I don't think will ever come back in life. Days when I studied with my brother together the whole day, where we charted out plans for the day, for the week and for the semester.......! How hard we worked, but still with so much joy. Oh, nostalgic!

Happy Teachers day!

September 5 of every year is a remarkable day, I never forget. It is a day, when I take time to thank all those who chiselled me to whatever I am today - MY TEACHERS!

The most important teacher and the best one I want to thank today is MY LIFE, MY EXPERIENCE! I have never seen a better teacher than her. Why Her, why not Him? Well, I have a reason to give my EXPERIENCE a feminine gender. That's because I mostly relate the EXPERIENCE to my MOTHER,because

-She makes sure I remember her wherever I go, whether she scolds me or she hugs me.
-Her thought gives me pleasant feelings, most of the times.
-She teaches me even the simplest thing of life.
And most importantly, 
-She teaches me, many times, the harsh way, because, she wants me to learn it, come what may and that's it!(and she knows those lessons stay longer than the sweet ones.)

I had wonderful experiences in the past years, and, especially in the recent years, when, my learning curve had been the steepest. I have interacted with so many people around, which in turn, has helped me understand my own self in a better way.

When I came across a silent person, I realized, how talkative I am!
& when I met a talkative person, I realized how much time I waste!

When I spoke with an argumentative person, I realized, what a critic I am!
& when some one criticized me, I realized how sensitive I am!

When I interacted with intelligent people, I realized how dumb I am!
& when I met dumb people, I realized how lucky I am!

When I met boastful people, I realized how simple I am,
 but when I met the real simple people, I realized how 'small' I am!

When I dashed with an angry person, I realized how arrogant I am!
& when I came across an arrogant person, I realized how impatient I am!

When I spent time with my friends and kins, I realized what a loving person I am,
but, When I met the real loving one, I was ashamed to know how selfish I am!

The lesson goes on....It never ends and is never going to..!

I am enjoying the lessons! Sometimes , I learn them quickly, sometimes I take a lot of time, sometimes I keep struggling with the hope that I will learn it soon and sometimes I am adamant not to learn it.  But, Life and experience are not that lenient teachers who will excuse me if I am lazy to take the lessons....So I know they are not going to let me move ahead until I learn it !

HAPPY TEACHERS DAY DEAR LIFE! KEEP MENTOR-ING ME LIKE THIS FOREVER!

My vote for alcohol prohibition!

A call from the wife of a young man, whom we know very well for a long time, has disturbed me a little. He has come up in his life with financial help from some elders in the society and most importantly through his sincerity and hardwork. But he has not yet reached any great heights. He is just in the steps to success. He still has the small struggles of life and I have always thought he has been gracefully handling it. Now this lady calls us one night and complains that her husband drinks alcohol with his friends often and she is scared! Her panicky complaint stopped suddenly and then the phone was switched off for the rest of the night! We could easily guess what must have happened there. We were shocked because this person was from a very poor background a decade ago, who would not even take tea / coffee unnecessarily. Even if we offered he would refuse. We have always seen him as a teetotaller! But this call shook me! Why does he not realize that this could ruin his life. His children are small, they are yet to complete their education and live their life. How can he be so irresponsible!

As a neuroscience graduate, I know the neurobiology behind alcoholism. It would start ruling a person. Its difficult to control (although not impossible). Now if he is going to lose all the money at the TASMAC, how is he going to run his family...and his business itself depends on being alert and sane! How will he do that carefully??!

Tamilnadu is a state that has a history of a very long term alcohol prohibition. It is said to have had prohibition from 1937-1971!  Whoever had been key to legalising alcohol again is solely responsible for ruining so many families!!!Once indiscipline creeps in, we all know how difficult it is to set it right again.And now that there is TASMAC, a government company that has monopoly over alcohol sales, the government is fetching lot of revenue from it.

If a nation is going to depend on its running on the revenue collected by ruining so many lives, what kind of nation is it!! I don't see it as anything different from a  mother selling her daughter off for lot of money, to run her family in a better way?Will this ever change? Will there be a prohibition again?

This is just a useless outburst that is an outcome of seeing a well-disciplined boy's family in the ladder of success, destroying themselves knowingly! Although I know it is a futile rambling, I also do not know what to do!!

But I am an insignificant person, who can still say, "I do not know what to do?" But how can some famous writers be so dumb.
http://blogs.timesofindia.indiatimes.com/The-underage-optimist/entry/saying-cheers-in-gujarat
When I read this article, I could not disagree more. When he says, there is no point in a law which everybody breaks, I am startled! There are people who break the law and do prostitution, there are people who break the law and indulge in drug abuse. So are you saying that all these should be legalised to prevent people from breaking law. Don't you think a simple man who earns his daily wages, will go for it only when there is availability readily and he is someone who will not fight through to fetch it at any cost. Law breakers are generally those wealthy lot, who can spend money to fetch it and enjoy! If you can't do some good to the society with your writing, its acceptable. But please do not create waves that will negatively impact the society. There are lots of people who respect your writing and so kindly try to use this huge responsibility properly!

I know for sure that this young man am talking about would not have become an alcoholic, if it was not readily available! And, I am sure, every Indian would have witnessed a story like this....a family like this!

I vote for complete prohibition of alcohol!

NB: This is not any kind of campaigning. It is just about my views!

The Twins' birthday

Everyone's house will have Vella seedai, Kara seedai, murrukku, thattai and butter. So I thought He and She will be bored of that traditional food !

Give way for ambulance please....!

108 is a great service! Life saving project!

Years ago, one of my relatives, died in an accident. Also I have heard my Uncle's friend died in an accident ages ago. Probably these people would have been saved if there was an 108 service then. From anywhere you call they will be there within 18 minutes. Many people have died in accidents because of excessive bleeding. If they had reached hospital on time, their lives could have been saved. There are so many other emergencies too that require timely attention.

Everyday when I go out, I see atleast one ambulance making that loud siren. "Give way to ambulance" is a rule. It is sad to see when ambulance is stuck in a traffic! I am just wondering the plight of those inside the ambulance at that moment.

Getting stuck in unavoidable traffic on one side, yesterday, when I heard an ambulance behind our car, I moved aside towards left, but to my surprise, there was another car that overtook me on my right!!! What a disgusting, shameful act! Some months ago, when I heard "Suki" sivam talk on a program, I heard him say that, "Today people are selfish to that extent that when an ambulance is heard, they want to hasten in front of it, and use the clear passage that the siren creates." I saw that yesterday. I witnessed this once in Bangalore also. To all those who irresponsibly do not give way for ambulance, listen...."Think how you would feel if one of your close ones is inside that ambulance. A Life could be saved if you are not so selfish. Every second could be precious for the life."

So please GIVE WAY TO AMBULANCE !

Note: Dial 108 in any emergency - be it a fire, crime or accident. It is a 24x7 FREE emergency service functioning in many states in India. They would ask for basic information like
1. The place where you are calling from
2.Type of emergency
3.Number of people injured
4.Caller's name and number

Anyone can call 108 from the place of accident and it is not necessary that the person affected should only call.

Let us help save a life with whatever best we can do.

Raksha Bandhan wishes!

Happy Raksha Bandhan to all my brothers.
I have too many of them. After all "All Indians are my brothers and sisters " .
But still there are only a few close to my heart, who at many instances have showered their love on me that it is impossible for me to verbalise their care for me. If I think of what they are to me, I can only cry in silence.

On this special day, I want them to know that they are very special to me.

To my brother who shares my joy and grief:
You are the most disciplined brother I have in my life. Perfectionism is thy name. I wonder how you accepted a sister like me! Because of your vocabulary prowess, you wrote several lines to me. I preserve them all, although I know I don't deserve any of them. Here is one of those that you wrote to me 12 years back.

You wrote to me
"So what if not of same blood
 Tears too prove when they flood"

I can't believe now that we are not of same blood!
Thanks Bhaiyya for being there at all times for me.

To my brother who lent his ears to me:
If I have to talk about this one, the first thing that comes to my mind is this, "Have we agreed with each other on atleast one thing so far...?? !"We always used to disagree with each other. Most of the times we spent in arguing! We were from completely different backgrounds, yet we have spent lot of time together in that home of ours where we actually became "philosophers" :-)! Even today though we are far away, when we talk on phone, we get enough time to argue....! But despite our differences, I must confess you are one brother who cared about my well being. You spent maximum time listening to me whenever I was in trouble.
Thanks for being there, Yaar.

To my brother whom I would call 'my mother':
I spent half a decade of my life in a hostel for the first time. I fell sick too often. He stood at my gate always with those special recipes he made especially for my sick self. If anyone here thinks a formal education civilizes people, we must all rethink. He disproved it. He proved that "Education is hardly required to be good-hearted". Today I am far off from him, but when I think of him, I recollect that he was just an embodiment of my mother.

To my little brother who fights with me, but still cares for me:
This is to that little brother of mine, who finds out reasons to irritate me and keeps bullying me. He is still very small, who has to grow a lot, but behaves at many times like an elder brother to me by his acts of care. Till today, I have never shown any special care towards him. But he still keeps calling me often to check on me and my well being.

There are lot more to mention. My blog pages would not be enough if I show that endless list. There are so many more whom I have been encountering in my life ,who have been contributing to my  growth at several points of time. Some have given their time listening to me, some have escorted me, some have spent time teaching me, some have written so many encouraging letters to me which I preserve still and so on....Some are elder to me, some are younger and some, though elder act like kids   ! My wishes to all of them and my sincere prayers for all their good health and happiness!

Truly,
Your Sister.

There was, there is and there will be no one.......if not YOU!

அக்கா அடிச்சா அம்மாகிட்ட அழலாம், அப்பா திட்டினாலும் அம்மாகிட்ட அழலாம், ப்ரெண்ட் கோபமா இருந்தா அம்மாகிட்ட அழலாம், அம்மாவே பேசலைனா யார்கிட்ட போய் அழுவறது??

பேசாம இந்த பாட்ட கேக்கலாம்:
"Naa Koi Hai Na Koi Tha Zindage Mein Tumhaare Siva"

My motivation to do physical exercise

Till few months back I was very motivated to do physical exercise and I used to hit the gym regularly. But of late because of lot of travelling (or whatever excuses!), had slackened a bit. Now it is getting difficult to fall into that routine.

I know exercising prevents most of the health problems, I also have experienced that if I regularly do it most of my health complaints also stay far off. I also know that this rigorous physical activity for an hour or two makes me feel fresh for the rest of the day. Moreover, I have witnessed so many publications stating the importance of Exercising in preventing age related neurodegenerative disorders....!
Despite knowing all this, ooooof...this procrastination.....!!

But now I am getting into this routine again.....and  I am amused to see what is driving me!!! It is this...

A decade back or even later than that, if someone on the road or someone in the train or temple would address me as "papa" , I used to be furious....I used to keep telling my mom,"Why do they call me papa? I am so grown up"...and all that...

But now...
When someone addresses me as "papa" in the temple or in train, I feel tickled and delighted! Ironically, I am definitely older than what I was a decade ago....But I feel excited now because, it reconfirms my illusion that I am still young and more than all that it motivates me to exercise so that I stay young for some more years......

What a motivation!!! Cheers!

ENGA RAMA!

See that Rose garland that my mother made today! I have never seen a more beautiful garland.....just fit for our Ram at Home. Thats Vaduvur Ramar, Pattabi Ramar and a rare picture of Hanumanji that was given to me by my Amma.

Hats off to my mother who makes such beautiful garland everyday.

Do I have to worry...!

Do I have to worry...
when I have a Mother to,

Console me when I cry
Laugh with me when I am happy
Pacify me when I am angry
Boost my spirit up when I am sad

Do I have to be bothered
when I have a Mother who,

Corrects me when I am wrong
Pulls me up when I slip
Teaches me to face life when I fear
Appreciates me when I am right

Do I have to be perturbed
when I have a Mother who,

Motivates me when I am discouraged
Warns me when I am overconfident
Fuels me when I am lazy
Accompanies me when I am alone

Do I have to be concerned
When I have a Mother who,

LOVES me despite my shortcomings
Only has LOVE to give me come what may

Maa, Despite all this you give me, I worry Maa, that I have nothing to give you... I have nothing to give you...
But you still LOVE me!

With the limited thinking ability, why do we try to analyse HER??!

A mother takes her child for an outing. The child is adamant to have an attractive sweet from a road side shop. The mother warns the child that it is not made in good oil and will upset the stomach. But the child is very adamant and continues throwing tantrums in the middle of the road and finally the mother yields to her son's wish. She gets the the sweet at last for her son. The child is happy and relishes the sweet joyfully.
A couple of days later, the child suffers from a severe stomach pain, high fever and heavy diarrhea. Mom is panicky. She runs to the doctor immediately, runs up and down to the chemist and laboratories carrying the child. She hardly sleeps. Until the child gets well, she also undergoes the pain along with the child. And because of the mother's touch the child experiences 'no pain' that it would have had otherwise. There is infection, there are symptoms, there is pain; but the child does not 'FEEL THE PAIN'!

Now, as a passive observer of this incident, can WE blame the mother for the 'pain' the child undergoes? or can we blame the child's ignorance for the 'pain' it undergoes?

The mother knew that this would happen. But the child was adamant. The mother yielded. But again when the child was in pain, it is mother to his rescue!

People who see the child feel sorry for the child looking at 'his state'! But the child has no pain because he is in his mother's arms always! You can pity the child, blame the mother, because you also love the child....But remember that "YOU CAN'T LOVE THE CHILD MORE THAN HIS MOTHER!"

'Infact, When the child did not eat the sweet, he was normal, he was 'painless'.
But now he is enjoying the pleasure of his mother's cuddle!'

Ipadithaan, Ammavala sila vishyangala thadukka mudinjalum, sila samayam Ava thadukradhila. Aana kashta padumbodhu adha Ava vedikka pakradhum illa! Adhunala.... AMMA mela kova padradhla arthame illa!

She is 'KARUNA RASA SAAGARA'!

Trust me...please!

Sometimes when we travel, we do get into the wrong bus by mistake. And when we realize, we get down immediately....We do not wait for the bus to reach its final destination, to get down...nor do we force the driver to drive to the place where we were supposed to go...nor do we change our place of visit just because we got into this bus. It is funny if someone tells you to change your place of visit. It is cruel if someone orders you to force the driver to go to your place of interest and it is stupid to wait for the final destination, to get down.

And it is pathetic if someone without understanding what has happened keeps telling to you..."Sab Sahi tho hai...Sab Sahi tho hai!!"I am not able to understand these people who tell you "hey, dont get down, this is a nice bus..it runs smoothly....", without even understanding what your problem is....!!!
To all such people I only request, "please trust me, I know what I am doing.."!!